I am finally doing our last placement's book. It has been over a year since they left.
When kids leave, I make a book on Shutterfly of the pictures I have of them. It is something I need to do; yet, it is something I hate to do. I have to write the ending to a chapter when I don't know the ending. I scroll through the picture files on my computer and one day, the kids are there; the next, they're gone. *Poof* One day, we are feeding ducks as a family of five. The next, we are at a restaurant as a family of three. I seal off their rooms and donate the stuff they couldn't take. I zumba, remodel, eat dump cake, drink wine, and somehow find a new norm. Until two more kids appear in my picture files. Then, we find another new norm until they disappear. Sometimes, I think I forget. Then I start making their book and realize I never forgot at all. I arrange the pictures. I label the pages. I give name to their time here. I remember all the things documented, and all the things not. I remember the truck pulling off and turning away before it disappeared because I could not stand to watch it roll out of sight.
Rachel, you are so amazing and inspiring. And I love the title of this post! I truly appreciate when you say that you give a name to their time with you. So often we run away from the pain and loss we experience in life. You and Matt are so brave and so wonderfully open to God's call in your life. Thank you for sharing. And I am so excited for y'all and for little Emmanuel (and for Isaiah, too)!
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